Goodbye!

I just stopped working yesterday. Over a span of 6 days, I worked for 4 days, and that was how long it took me to quit it. Most of the time, it is the people that have me quitting jobs. Stingy bosses, naggy managers, evil managers who aren't even my manager, you know. For this time round, I can't seem to pinpoint what made me hate this job. A little bit of everything I guess. the people are generally nice, cept when I make a mistake or some shit. They can get quite naggy. My breaks are spent alone, I don't have any friends there, and my breaks are always different from everyone. The job is tiring and evil. Cashiers have to pay for shortages every day. I almost lost $50, luckily it was retraced. That was definitely a shock for me. A big scare, and it was only my third day at work. Anal customers I can handle, I just need to scan their stuff as quick as possible and they are out of my lives forever. What I can't stand it when I have problems and the other staff don't even lend me a hand. I can't help being noob shit at being a cashier, I only did for like three days?

I was planning to continue for another 2 weeks, at least get the bonus. On the last day I worked, I woke up at 4 am in the morning to pee, and I just couldn't seem to fall back asleep. Countless thoughts filled my mind, about work and shit. That overwhelming uncertainty was so daunting it kept me awake till 7.45am, the time I was supposed to wake up. I couldn't sleep, like sudden insomnia or something. During the 3 hours and 45 minutes, I reduced my duration of work. From 3 more weeks, I changed my mind to 2 more weeks, to 1 day.

I wanted to stop dreading something, especially something I brought upon myself. And the one solution to it all was just to end it. That simple. I guess the cash and bonus was not worth the depressing over. Besides, I wanted to make friends there but I just ended up getting shit. Whatever, hopefully that part of my life doesn't come back to haunt me. I hate it that I'm cursed with hating my jobs. So far, I have hated all my jobs. I thought this job will be better, but no, it's prolly one of the worst ones.

Enough with crappy evil jobs. So I got my results. For .2 semester, I'm really unsatisfied with my results. While other people are jumping with joy with their 3.6 GPAs, I'm stuck at 3.2, and I really did put in effort this semester. I still remember squeezing my literally dead brain on stifling nights to come up with a good story for storytelling, but I'm not complaining about that cos my storytelling score was alright. I'm surprised at my IS score though. I guess I actually did something right in Cindy's eyes. But but, the most aggravating part of it all is the fucking C+ for photography. I swear to god my photography lecturer hates me. I spent so much cash on film and developing film, traveling out of civilization to filthy places just to take a few shots of interesting subjects. All of that for a C+? Seriously, I commented like twice, they shouldn't let just one person be the judge of our photos. At least one more or something, to make things a bit more impartial. Just because I am not a cat/grass/water-droplets-on-leaves fetish doesn't mean I'm terrible. It's like so subjective, it seems almost too unfair. Just sayin'.

Ya, so if I can only get a 3.2 GPA for the easiest semester, I really wonder what my grades will pan out in the future.

Anyway, I'm only blogging here cos I have nothing to do and no one to talk to. This blog is absolutely dead and I am really consider deleting it. Well, we shall see. This blog is so public I can't say what I really feel and show who I really am. Ya, it pretty much sums up why I don't blog here anymore.

Okay so I may have more than a pair of plimsolls but what I hate about my bunch of accessories is that I never owned a pair of decent shades in my life, ever. Like I'm not really picky with my shades, I rather just a pair of cheap $10 shades from Cotton On that comes in different colours too. I tried to get a pair before when CO had a sale. But my parents hates the shades and refuses to get me a pair. I mean, they have shades, don't know why they don't like the idea of me having a pair myself.

But finding a pair for me is a little difficult cos I have a gigantic skull and all the ones I have tried before kinda squeezes my head. So I've been looking at some sites now and like shutter shades are in now. I'm not a trendy person, I don't normally like to follow trends. I just buy what I visually appeals to me, and shutter shades look really nice!

There are quite a variety of shapes. I like trons.

Future future future perfect!

Okay so holiday life has been like super shitty for me. Spent half of the first month mourning, and the other half on slacking and binging and failed attempts at getting jobs. I seriously hate the idea of resumes.

I'm looking forward to Imogen Heap LIVE though. It is sort of the only thing I can look forward to.

I'm gonna be short. I'm like fine now, so that's a good thing. I made a promise that my ultimate life goal will be to meet Kris face to face. It's naive, but at least I have something to live for. So right now, what I can do is to be as nice as possible to build up on good karma. Yes, I'm trying really hard to be nice.

Anyway, the WEATHER IS FUCKING HOT! OH MY GOSH! DAMN DAMN WARM! I walk out of the bathroom and I start perspiring like shit. Wah, really cannot take it. In times like this, the air-conditioner is by far the best invention ever.

I haven't been blogging here cos Tumblr is like the new thing now and it is so much more convenient than Blogger. I don't really need to post anything at all.

So ya, I may close this down, we'll see.

I won't be blogging until I feel normal again. My life is so full of shiz now, ugh I want to kill everyone.

Goodbye.

Yesterday, I had IS lessons and Lena and I decided to give it a miss since we have not used any of our coupons yet. So I happily slept until 9am before I had to go to school for a meeting for the last IS assignment. I was still very lethargic despite longer sleep so I was around an hour late for the meeting. Thank god my groupmates were nice and they didn't mind, maybe cos I was half an hour early for our first meeting. So we went to the atrium to discuss our presentation and I saw many familiar faces.

The meeting ended an hour or so later and I went home alone. On my trip back home, Azzy messaged me to say that KRIS ALLEN(!) is coming to Singapore for a one night gig at Zirca, which is a fucking nightclub. Fingers crossed, I rushed back home to check the minimum age limit for entry. Searched some forums, called the enquiries hotline, and my hopes were literally crushed, torn apart, bashed, nuclear bombed. They said the minimum age was 18. I know, I can just get a fake ID and enter the club. And I don't even like the idea of clubbing and dancing with other people who think they are hot when they are so not. But I'm like turning 18 this November, it's kinda stupid to spend 50 bucks on something I will throw away in less than a year. And not only that, I still have to buy the ticket in, which is $99. It's going to make me fucking bankrupt. So, no point risking so much and spending so much. It's KRIS ALLEN(!), but I'm not that obsessed, yet.

Giving up my hopes and dreams, I felt like fucking shit the whole day yesterday. Felt like crying my heart out, stab myself ten times, and jump into a pot of hot oil and feed myself to a wild boar. But I got a little better after a good night's sleep. Since I can't go, the best I can do is pray KRIS ALLEN(!) keeps alive for another gig in Asia.

Woke up this morning and felt like having good karma so that a miracle might happen. Woke up an hour earlier than I should and went to Ang Mo Kio and got Koi for the two other crazy bitches. Their expression when I took out the bubble tea was damn funny. It was like the theatre was filled with low whispers of "Oh my god!", almost like humming. Ya so after school, I came home and stayed at the living room, being a couch potato as usual. Then I turned on the television. Just when I thought I was recovering from my depression, there was an advertisement about KRIS ALLEN(!) coming for a gig here. At first, it was like taking a bullet, a cold hard fucking bullet. Then I went to see the details, since it can't get any more painful already. Then right there, the minimum age limit: 16. Time literally froze. Church bells started ringing and a gospel choir singing. Birds were chirping. Rainbows appeared above me. Everything became so colourful all of a sudden. I was FUCKING HAPPY. It was the feeling I got when the people from Ngee Ann called me, it was a fucking awesome feeling.

Even though Rachel recorded my call I don't fucking care if it gets on Youtube cos I am just so fucking happy. So fucking excited now. And I am so fucking thankful for everything right now. My life is fucking complete at this moment.

I am so fucking happy!

Today has been such a stressful day, and everything was pretty much going the wrong way. Like how I woke up in the morning only to find my phone with only one bar. And then I charged it but when I came out of the shower it was not charging at all despite it being plugged in. Then Lena and I reached school at 9am only to find 4 people present in total. Could have slept for an hour more or something. But besides all the very agitating trivial matters, it was good stress cos obviously this is just one day of actual working stress. It's going to be 30 years of these kind of days in future.

My morning shift for FMS Open House was actually quite alright. It was relatively quiet, and like I toured a maximum of 10 people. My first tour had 2 people. And I did a total of 3 tours. Like there was this girl in my last group who told me to relax cos they knew how stressed I was. It was a nice experience nonetheless.

Also met Primero Ang today. Oh my gosh, the most fucked up thing happened just when the most important meeting of my semester 1.2 life was going to happen. Like right after class finished, my phone fucked up and it couldn't access to network throughout the whole time I tried to call everyone. Then like good thing Chingy was online and like she helped me call Sasha. Anyway, the meeting went smoothly. What a fucking relief!

Now, I'm like totally drained from hours of hyperventilating + panic attacks + touring + banging my phone on the table + tweeting about my heart attacks. Went to Kang Kar Mall for dinner just now and I got totally turned off by the noodle store person. He was a stand in for like the main cook and he was fucking rude. Like he was hard of hearing or didn't clean his ears and like I had to shout to him YES I WANT CHILLI. And then like I wanted a bigger bowl of soup and he fucking didn't let me! WTF. What kind of service is that? The customer should be allowed to have what they order, even if it takes more cash or something. Ugh, so annoying. The next time he works there, I am so not eating there.

Okay, I know my blog is like lacking photos, but I hate uploading photos. Anyway, I might change to Tumblr. So much easier to use. And it works the Twitter way.

Till next time!